It is Not for the Stars to Decide [MB]

[Starrlight]

[bg=black][atrb=width,500,true][atrb=border,0,true]  Nuada Setante    Without knowledge, there can be no light Yellow flowers covered the hill on which they sat, as they covered every hill it seemed throughout the Irish spring. The air was warm as always, but told of coming rain, something that too was a norm for the season. The sun was bright as it shone upon his companion, and her fur sparkled as though it had caught fire. It's funny, that's what he remembered most about that day. Not the words spoken, nor why they were there, but the sun on her coat. That and the overwhelming sense of happiness that he felt. It wasn't much to recall, but it was more than enough. That was when he first began courting her. How naive they had been. They tried to hide it at first, their changing relationship, but no one could hide anything from the pack for long. The day they were found out was the day his father first looked upon him with disgust in his eyes, and the day her father, Alpha of the pack, taught him a lesson that he meant to make stick. He might have killed him had she not intervened. His kind did not mix with hers, and they were expected to break it off instantly. When they did not, she was replaced in the hierarchy, and her parents cast her aside like old prey, something to be replaced with a more suitable piece. She was gone now, though, and the irony of the situation was not lost on Nuada. Here he was now, a proper Alpha, worthy in rank for her at last. Somehow he felt that, wherever she was, she too was having a good laugh at the way fate played her hand sometimes. That was what life was all about, though, wasn't it? Rewriting one's destiny? Though he supposed he shouldn't call it rewriting, since technically it wasn't written in the first place. Simply suggested by the turn of events. What one did with those events, however, truly decided the path followed. Growing tired of hearing himself think, Nuada got to his feet and yawned, stretching muscles that had gone stiff from lying too long. He had wandered off that morning, desiring some time alone, but once there, found no comfort left to his own devices. He had stayed however, for the quiet was nice. The tree under which he had rested lay right next to one of the streams that wound through the territory, and its whispering voice soothed his racing mind once more as he focused on it. Now he walked along it, back in the direction that he had come. Ahead he could see his sister standing on the bank, staring with seemingly great concentration at its surface. Nuada chuckled, coming around beside her. "Lose somethin?" He asked, nudging her. She hadn't heard him approach, obviously, because his sudden appearance made her jump so violently that she almost fell in. "Nu!" She gasped, pulse pounding. "Gods, warn me next time! And no, as a matter of fact. I'm tryin somethin." She looked at him ruefully once more, than went back to looking. "Aye, I see. Let me know how that works out for yeh." She's finally losing it, he thought with amusement, glancing back as he walked away. Gone bonny well mad, poor girl. Kaelyn heard him walk away, but didn't take her eyes away from the stream. Finally she saw what she was looking for... a shadow flitting across the bottom. With a lunge she went after it, striking the icy water and snapping at the bottom. She came up empty, however, and leapt back on the bank, shaking water from her fur with a shiver. "That could've gone a bit better", she growled, annoyed. It was an idea that had hit her these past weeks as prey was growing more and more scarce. Fish were still swimming, however, and she knew that some wolves made use of them for food. She'd thought she might try the same. Not that it was doing her much good. That was her try for the day. Maybe tomorrow she would have more luck. She started to walk back in the direction her brother had gone, but stopped. No way she wanted him to see her come back soaking wet and have to explain why. He seemed in a teasing mood, and she was hardly up for that right now. Nay, better to stay here and dry off first. +---------------------------------------------+ Word Count: 740 OoC: Feel free to jump in wherever. My muse isn't running well tonight, but a post is a post =] Kaelyn Setante  Just as without light, there can be no life.

[Asphyxia]

[bg=000000][atrb=width,530,true][atrb=border,0,true] Since the moment his daughter had come into the world, she had been a serious, quiet pup, observing, learning and keeping to herself unless she felt the need to learn from an Elder or another. He and his mate had named her Arista, meaning the best. She had been, after all. Of the six whelps born, she was the only to live to the birth and beyond from there. And she continued to thrive even as she grew older and eventually weaned from her mother. Her thoughts were provoking, her mind intelligent. She questioned things that Roman himself had no answers to. As a youngster of only three months, she asked him if there was any true substantial evidence of a God, let alone a reason for existence. And from then on, he knew she would be different than others, especially her age. Her mother, Cybele believed Arista to be evil, to carry a dark spore deep within her soul that was constantly growing and blooming into something larger that soon would take over them all. She grew severely anxious around her daughter, fearful of her, even and avoided Arista at all costs after she was weaned. Arista, of course, asked her father on it. A father who did not understand her, but desperately wanted to, and a mother who feared her. “Why does mother fear me, father.. why does she avoid me?” Her earnest little spheres gazed at him, questioning him, searching his own golden spheres and he wasn’t entirely sure how to answer. “Your mother fears what she does not know or understand, as do many.” The puppy glanced at the ground, her gaze narrowing and hardening with concentration and thoughts as she gave one small nod of acknowledgement to her father’s words. He studied her carefully as she stared at the earth beneath her large puppy paws and knew that she would forever be an outcast, forever be considered different, that she would never fit in anywhere and that as the years came and went, she would question things there were no answers to. She would search for these answers relentlessly the rest of her life, he would discover later, trying to fulfill a void within herself. His brow furrowed as he lowered his snout and gave the pup a gentle, affectionate nudge. She tilted her crown and gazed back up at him, her expression still ever-questioning, although she remained quiet and did not ask anymore questions, but she did give him a small smile. That was the last time he had ever seen her smile. She had been three months old. Only three months old and after that, no more smiles. It was like any joy or happiness or good that had been left in her heart had vanished and she was still good, in the sense of not necessarily being evil or doing anything evil, but she didn’t do any good either or feel any good. Everything positive in her had vanished and it was as if she held no emotions. None. She was void of feeling. Roman sighed as he thought back on the days before she had become who she had become. Before her mother had betrayed the pack and them. Before Arista had gone off on her own in search of something, although he knew not what. Since then, three years ago, he had not seen or heard a peep from his daughter. Not even a whiff of a scent. He was sure she was somewhere, still searching, still trying to find something to fill the void within herself. But to what extent would she go to find something even she couldn’t figure out? For how long would she search and be disappointed in not finding it. For how long would she long for something she had naught of? He didn’t know and he could only hope she would have found it by now, or find it and be happy for once in her life. Truly happy. Happiness, it was a thing that was taken for granted far too often, especially by those who had it constantly. Was he happy? He wasn’t unhappy… But was he happy? He wasn’t so sure. Content seemed like a better fitting word for how he felt. Tuatha gave him a feeling of home and contentment. He enjoyed the company of the wolves here, the quiet and most of all, how separate it was from pure and evil, from light and darkness. It was an entire entity on its own. Ozymandias, a wolf who seemed to view him as a fatherly figure, who sought him out for friendship and advice. He enjoyed the relationship they had. It was like a bond he had never gotten to have with his daughter – he now had it with a wolf he could very well come to think of as his son. Rumor… Quiet, shy and withdrawn as she was, had opened up a bit over the past five months and he was happy to be there to see it and help her along in the process, even if she still didn’t view anyone as her friends quite yet and if she did, was still building the amount of trust it would take her. Nuada was a good King to Tuatha, he got done what was necessary and was ever-helpful and concerned with his pack, even for as small as it currently was. Kaelyn, his sister, also slightly withdrawn, seemingly bitter, but it seemed like she had resigned herself to the fact the three were here to stay and she seemed to be forming a friendship with Rumor. A smile tipped the wolf’s white lips as his thoughts changed to the present, to the wolves he surrounded himself with. Acoustics pricked forward, nostrils flaring as he scented at the air briefly. Nuada? Was that whose scent was carried toward him on the breeze? He felt the breeze wrap itself around his body and slide through his thick cloak. Welcomed it. Pulling up his stiff hindlegs from the ground, Roman stretched. He was growing stiff and could feel the pains of arthritis coming to him already. He was, however, eight years old. How many more years did he have? Should he care? He resigned himself to simply enjoy whatever time he had left. Walking off in the direction of Nuada’s scent, Roman thought he may have spotted someone else – Ozy? - walking through the trees. But when he took a second glance, nobody was there. Giving his crown a light shake, he figured he was probably starting to see things in his old age too. How long until his hearing went? How much longer until his seeing was going? Ozy and Rumor seemed to have been avoiding one another as of late and while it concerned Roman, he decided not to push the subject on them. Spotting Nuada weaving his way through the trees, Roman picked up his pace into a gentle lope to catch up. Coming up alongside his alpha, he gave a small dip of his wideset mug, tipped his auds forward and swayed his plume side to side. “Nuada. ” The greeting was simple, yet respectful. Choosing to fall into step with the other male, he figured if Nuada wanted alone time, he would ask for it. “It’s growing colder and it seems the prey is growing a little more scarce as time goes by. From my understanding, we’re not as bad off as the other packs though. Do you think we’ll have it any easier than they do?

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[Asphyxia]

[bg=00090E][atrb=width,518,true][atrb=border,0,true] “Why do they fear you so, Rumor?” The young male glanced at the female who stood nearby, slowly walking herself around the small clearing by the stream, gently pawing at the tall grass. She didn’t answer at first, her gaze concentrating on pacing around, almost lazily. The young male tilted his crown to the side, ears flopping slightly. He hadn’t known her long. Her mother was queen of the pack, but had birthed Rumor a year or so before she’d become queen alongside her new king, interestingly, not Rumor’s father. But he’d accepted Rumor, best of his ability for having an heiress that was not of his own blood. Riley wanted to know, most of all, why the rest of the pack feared this young female so much. She was just one wolf. “Why do you think they named me Rumor, Ri’?” She glanced at him, her front right paw stepping down upon a blossoming flower, crushing it into the earth’s surface. She tipped her crown slightly as she observed him, waited for a reply. “I’m not sure… I figured they liked the name?” He blinked, wondering where she was going with the conversation. “What is a rumor…?” She paused, but not long enough for him to answer, before she continued. “It’s something spoken of that is not confirmed true. Something… That could completely contradict what it appears – or is said… to be.” She smiled lightly at him, wondering what he was thinking. “But I haven’t heard any rumors about you, Rumor.” “Not yet.” She stopped in her movements and stared at him. He stared back, uncertain of her meaning. He lacked the skill and training to have seen her coming. To have made a move before she did, or to have seen the way her muscles shifted. In seconds, she was upon him. In several more, his throat was torn out and dropped into the stream. Salmon rushed to the bloody meat, nipping at it for food. His body lay half in the stream, half upon the earths soft grass, his blood dripping down into the otherwise clear water, running it red. “That’s why they call me Rumor.” Just a whisper, as if he could hear it anyway being dead… A whisper, as one lover to another might use such a soft tone. And then silence… A scream ripped from Rumor’s lips, her body jolting upward so quick, she felt the muscles in her body cry out in pain. Eyes wide, frightened, she gazed around. She’d fallen asleep? It was a dream, just a dream… Right? She shook her head roughly, shaking out her coat as her body vibrated in place, her plume tucked tight between her hind legs. Acoustics stayed flat upon her skull as she looked around, hoping nobody had heard her, hoping, wishing that it had just been a dream. Blood… The taste, the smell, the feel, all of it had felt so real. She couldn’t pull her mind back from it. Not yet. She felt ripped apart, like a nightmare become real had just grabbed what was left of her sanity and tore it out with vicious claws. But that hadn’t happened… Riley… Who was Riley? She could have swore she recognized him, the face, the name, the scent… She could still smell him. Lifting herself up from her belly, Rumor ran to the stream nearby, hoping she wouldn’t find his body. But she found nothing. What had happened? Just a dream… A small whimper escaped her lips as she looked around once more. Maybe she’d find the body if she followed the stream. If not, it could confirm that it was just a dream, right? Claws dug deep into the earth’s soil, her acoustics slowly lifting upward as she looked up and down the stream. But which way to go? Both ways, she would follow the stream both ways. Deciding to go left, she followed the stream up north through Tuatha, searching, hoping she wouldn’t find it. She searched the stream for any signs of blood and a few times, had thought she’d seen it when it had only been a fish skittering by, or a rock beneath the surface. For half a day, she travelled up northward, and found no traces of any body. None… South she would go. Retracing her steps, she headed south. But she found nothing, the entire way she followed the stream, up to the pack borders. For an entire day and an entire night, she paced the stream back and forth. For a day and a night, one sun, one moon, she kept waiting to find the body, unable to tell herself that all it was, was a dream. She racked her brain for memories of her old pack, for memories of her home before the lab, for any memories of wolves before she’d been placed with the humans for testing. And couldn’t remember a thing. Had they stolen away her memories? Erased them? The dream still felt too real, even a day later. And this was how she came across Kaelyn. The she-wolf was attempting to fish, but to no avail and it wasn’t long before her brother, Nuada appeared, teasing his sister for her attempts. Rumor remained watching from afar, sliding herself into the shadows as she observed the two. If they found the body… But they wouldn’t, she couldn’t even find it… It was a dream… That’s all. Shifting her spheres between Nuada and Kaelyn, she watched as Nuada walked off laughing. Kaelyn, still clearly determined to capture a fish, dunked herself into the water in the process of her attempt, but to no avail did she catch a fish. Rumor had become an excellent fisher over the past few years, especially while on her own. As Kaelyn was left alone, simmering in her cold, wet fur, clearly deciding to remain where she was. Deciding she may as well go and try to show her how to fish, Rumor slipped from the trees back to the stream and headed in the direction of Kaelyn. Although she was across the stream from Kaelyn, she was sure Kaelyn would be able to pick up on Rumor’s example. Rumor didn’t say a word, simply came up across from Kaelyn on the bank of the stream and smiled slightly at the other female, her acoustics lifting forward on her cranium. Gingerly stepping into the stream, she stilled herself once she was in, waiting, watching, her nose close to the waters surface. Her eyes shifted, but not a muscle moved on her body, for so much as a tremor in the water might make the fish skitter away. Waiting, patiently, she must have waited for about five or ten minutes, silent, before she finally saw fish swimming about her legs. A salmon swam before her chest, about a foot beneath the surface and with a great lunge, Rumor dunked her head beneath the water, jaws snapping about the slippery, wet body. Knowing how slippery the fish were and how easily she could lose grip of the body, she swung her head up and back, tossing it back onto the bank of the stream. Cold and wet now, she trudged out of the water and sat next to the flopping fish, firmly pressing her paw down on it while it slowly died on the bank. She glanced back up at Kaelyn, and deciding that she should head over to the other side and maybe show her at closer range if she so wished, she grabbed the fish in her jaws and waded back into the water and across the stream, pulling herself out next to the other female. Dropping the now-still fish between them both, she glanced from Kaelyn, back to the stream, an attempt to encourage her. From what she had studied, Kaelyn simply hadn’t stood in the water patiently enough to wait for them to get close enough. They were quick, so the further away the fish were, the harder they were to catch. We forget we change... wordcount;; one thousand, three hundred, thirty-five lyrics;; radio

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[Starrlight]

[bg=black][atrb=width,500,true][atrb=border,0,true]  Nuada Setante    Without knowledge, there can be no light Nuada was deep in thought when Roman approached. Winter was here, and with it it bore the gift of countless cares. As alpha of the pack it was his job to make sure every pack member was safe and fed. He knew that from this point that goal was only going to get harder. Luckily here the winter was mild. It was not so in his homelands. The moors that they had dwelled in by now would be buried in snow, the wind whistling across it death to any who sought rest without shelter. So harsh a region was it that each winter they expected losses. His father had always said that was the way of things, but Nuada was glad that things worked in a different order here. They were not yet well enough established here to take on the fury of nature. Food was getting harder to find, however. Kaelyn's attempts only brought that fact home to him, and he somewhat regretted poking fun at her for it. It would be useful if she learned to catch the fish from the river. Perhaps he too should give it a try sometime. He sighed. Apologies weren't something he was fond of when it came to his sister, but he figured he owed her one this time. Especially if she came back successful. Luckily some of the game that dwelled in the forest, like the pack, stayed there year round. He knew that a few herds of deer still roamed, and he had seen a few rabbits from afar that appeared to be changing color from summer to winter. This showed him that it probably did snow here, but much later in the season than he was used to. They would need to hunt before that time came. He would take a run that afternoon and see if he could find any good deer trails. Between He, Kae, Ozy, Roman, and maybe Rumor if she was up to it, they could definitally take down a deer or two. He had just come to this conclusion when he looked up, nodding a greeting at Roman. He had heard the older wolf approaching and was glad to have the company now that his thoughts were in order. He really liked the bru. He had an easy manner and a logical assuredness that made conversation extremely pleasant. His way of speaking was as different from Kaelyn as night from day, and Nuada enjoyed this change of pace more than he could ever say. He loved his sister, but months of only her company had left him wanting. When Roman brought up exactly what had been on his mind only moments ago, Nuada couldn't help but smile. "Aye, tha be true. I've nah ken whether or nah other packs are doin better than we ourselves, so yer own judgement would be a far sight more useful than me own. However, I was thinkin maybe a hunt wouldna be a bad idea?" Kaelyn leapt out of the water and shook out her coat, growling irritably. She shivered in the chilly air as she glared balefully at the water. "Ruddy fish", she muttered. She'd made multiple attempts, all in vain, and had decided to stop at least three times before. She just couldn't let it be. There was no way those stupid things were going to get the best of her. It was getting later in the morning, though, and she really wasn't making any progress. Perhaps it would be best not to scare all the fish away and try again fresh tomorrow. She was actually going to give it up when she spotted Rumor. Stopping, she watched the other fem with curiosity and a little trepidation. So far she had not approached her, and Kaelyn had been loathe to initiate. She knew that Rumor was skittish from her companion's words, and she did not want to scare her off. She did wonder, though, what had happened to make her that way. Kaelyn herself had her own share of skeletons, however. There was no way she was going to pry into the affairs of another. Rumor did not speak, which came as no surprise. Instead she appeared to have the same goal as Kaelyn. Curiosity turned to close observation as Rumor stepped into the water. She had a confidence about her that told of practice, and Kaelyn sat on the bank silently, watching. She quickly caught on that this was an impromptu lesson, one that she sorely needed if these past few hours were any indicator. She stood in the water for what seemed like forever, completely still. Kae was just beginning to think she had misjudged when suddenly there was a splash. A glittering arc of water flew from where Rumor was standing and a silver fish flopped onto the bank. Disbelief and respect filled Kaelyn at the effectiveness of Rumor's method. She could now see that she hadn't been patient enough. That was why she could not get close enough to catch anything. Full of a new determination, she watched Rumor cross and approach her. "That was impressive. Thank yeh, I think I know why now." She stepped carefully into the water, then made her way a distance out, feeling the tug of the frigid current about her legs. Shadows darted around her, but none were close. Forcing down her impatience, she made herself wait, biding her time until the moment arose. She wasn't sure exactly when that would be yet, but she knew it wouldn't come so swiftly. After a long while had passed and her legs were going numb from the stream, a fish finally came close enough. She lunged, snapping at it, but misjudged it's texture and it slipped from her grasp. She hadn't quite grasped it correctly. Still, her eyes shone triumphantly. "Almost had tha' one! Now if I coul' just keep a holda' it..." +---------------------------------------------+ Word Count: 985 OoC: Just realized I could have posted this forever and a day ago oops! And can I just say how much fun their accents are XD even if the do suck, I love attempting all the same! Lemme know if they get obnoxious and I'll stop haha Kaelyn Setante  Just as without light, there can be no life.

[tyraden]

Ayasha had never walked so much in her life. Her feet were worn out, dirt had built up between her toes and in her fur all over. She slumped over and continued to push herself to walk just a little bit further; she could hear the sound of water somewhere still flowing. The wind blew harder than normal and she shivered, skipping slightly to get behind a tree to block herself from the wind as much as she could. This cold weather is for the birds, she thought bitterly with a growl.

As the wind died down after a few moments, she continued to walk toward the water. She didn't go much further before her hair raised her. Every muscle in her body tensed up for a second and she took a little taller much to her body's protests. She could not only hear the water but she could hear something else and that smell... A wave of dread crashed over her. She had tread upon someones land, another wolf's land. She swallowed and wondered if she could get away with just running to the river, getting a sip and slink away before anyone notices.

Her thoughts raced. Would her body even make it to the river? It had to. She would make herself if it killed her. She was convinced just a sip of water would make her feel ten times better. The need for that water pushed her to take another step and another and before she knew it she was running, her legs and lungs screaming, weaving in and out of trees, dodging bushes and leaping over roots. The sound was getting louder and louder by the second and the smell of a pack grew stronger and stronger.

Suddenly, the river appeared in front of her. She was panting and shaking as she lowered her head and practically dunked her whole head underneath, sloppily taking large gulps of water. She raised up and sighed as her body relaxed. Sleep, it cried. Ayasha inhaled and suddenly realized the smell of wolves were too close for comfort. She knew they would smell her soon and find her and... she didn't want to think of the consequences of being in a place she didn't belong, stealing water that didn't belong to her.

She raised herself up slowly, quickly stretched and began walking once more.

[Asphyxia]

[bg=001216][atrb=width,518,true][atrb=border,0,true] One word, one sentence, one rumor could tear apart an entire kingdom, and the irony of it was that Rumor was just that, she was that very thing that could tear apart her mother’s entire kingdom; who knew her mother would be so accurate in naming her daughter. Her mother, who constantly forgave and turned a blind eye to the power that Rumor held over her kingdom, her mother, who was in such denial that her daughter could so easily murder someone of innocent blood. But the King had not been in denial, he did not turn a blind eye. He had been the reason that Rumor had ended up in the hands of humans for experimentation; how could he leave his pack without the security of knowing their own pack members would not turn on them and tear their throats out? And that was Rumor’s favorite move, to tear out the throat while they were alive, leave their blood to choke them to death as they bled out. Later, Rumor would reflect that she had been naïve, so very naïve, to believe that her stepdad had wanted to go on a hunt with her to get to know her for the sake of her mother’s happiness. So naïve. That hadn’t been what he had wanted at all… Moments, that’s all it took, was moments, she reflected later. Moments were all it took for everything to change, for better or worse. One word, one action. He had asked her to simply go on a hunt to get to know each other better, and for the sake of her mother, she had agreed. One question, one answer and one action. And it landed her in the moments that followed. She hadn’t been expecting it, when he had told her that he was going to run a herd of deer in her direction and she was to single out the weakest – she hadn’t expected the moment when a dart landed in the muscle of her neck, embedding itself, infecting her with the poison that made her stagger, then slowly stumble to the ground. She had gone down fighting it, fighting the intravenous fluids that landed in her artery, shooting up through her veins to her heart and bringing everything to slow motion. She’d felt it as she fell, had tried to get back up, had tried to stand and run, but she only collapsed again, her legs no longer working. And as she lay in the dirt, staring into the trees, she saw her stepdad there, watching with a grim look upon his features; and it was then that she spotted her mother in the darkness of the trees too, tears in her eyes as she turned her face away, nuzzled into her mate, then turned and ran off. Something wet was matting into her thick fur around her face. Was she crying? Crying for what? The betrayal, the mother who turned her back on her daughter? What was she crying for? She could see still, was conscious, but she could feel her body being lifted, quite uncomfortable, and the gross smell of humans flooded her nostrils. She had expected death, had welcomed it. She had not expected a laboratory, had not expected testing and constant pain. Had not expected to be alive and tortured. The betrayal, she finally understood it. And as she screamed into the night in her cage the following eve, she realized that she had split into two halves; she was no longer whole, she was not Rumor anymore. Would she ever look forward to anything more than pain? Anything more than fear? Anything more than… Nothing? Rumor sat and watched silently, the entire time, as Kaelyn mimicked Rumor’s tactics upon the river and fish, her bi-colored eyes staring, watching, waiting. She anticipated seeing the femme succeed, and she was anxious to see it happen. What was this feeling? This feeling of complete friendliness. But then, Nuada and Kaelyn had been nothing but friendly and generous in offering their home to the three renegades, and Roman and Ozy, she was ever grateful to them, even if she still didn’t trust any of them. This feeling, it was so unfamiliar to her, so hard to recognize for what it truly was. But then, her lack of trust had everything to do with her previous betrayal, her previous experiences, who she had once been versus who she now was, and all the more to do with the torture and pain, both physical and emotional, that she had been through. Acoustics tipped forward as she watched the other female wait, still as a statue, for the fish to swim about her legs, just as Rumor had done. It was a while, the wait, but it was worth seeing the triumph Kaelyn showed after she had successfully captured it, even if she had lost it because of the slippery scales. Rumor’s words were soft, but a tiny whisper upon the air, “You’ll get it eventually…” She blinked, as she realized she had spoken, the sound of her own voice so foreign to her these days, and she quickly shut herself down again, the barriers slamming down to protect herself, as she quickly looked away and pretended that the small words of encouragement hadn’t happened at all, that the bit of warmth had not ever slipped from her lips. It was then, that a scent came upon the air and she realized someone else was coming towards the river. Panic struck Rumor immediately, completely throwing her over the edge. This was a stranger, she didn’t recognize her smell at all, and she began shaking violently as soon as she realized someone was near enough to approach. Her acoustics flattened firmly to her skull, plume tucking. How had she become this? This quivering mass of nerves and fears and barriers and anxiety? She spotted a female, who looked utterly ragged from exhaustion, and as much as Rumor wanted to welcome her, be friendly, be a part of the pack that was of any real use, the anxiety attack hit her hard, freezing her in place as she stared at the female, hoping she would not approach her, hoping that instead, the female would approach Kaelyn. How had she become this? Rumor could see herself, could see herself from above; she could see the shaking, the utter fear and anxiety, the sheer pathetic inability to pull herself together, and she couldn’t help but wonder: when would the two halves come back together to make a whole again? When would she be Rumor again? She had lost herself and she didn’t know how to get back. Her eyes immediately snapped to Kaelyn, hoping the other female would step up and distract this other female from approaching her. Hoping Kaelyn understood, for she knew that this female here, that stood before her, would not understand. One moment, she was frozen to the ground beneath her paws, the next, she felt the twitch of muscles move and took her chance to flee in that brief moment. Kaelyn would have no problem welcoming the new female, but Rumor wasn’t up to it, she couldn’t handle it. Her paws ran and she was sure if her fear didn’t keep her moving, she would have run herself into the ground. As she glanced over her shoulder, continuing to run forward, it took a mere second for her to realize that she hadn’t looked where she was running, had been too caught up in the past, in her fears and mistrust of strangers – when BAM. It happened. Her body completely crashed into Ozy, sending her tumbling to the earth and leaving her sprawled on the ground. For a moment, she didn’t know what in the world had happened, just saw a flash of light as she slammed into him, then darkness for a bit before her eyes adjusted again. Blinking, she glanced over, still shaking, but too caught up in the moment of what happened to move much more or get up again. Instead, she gave in. She forfeited the running away, forfeited the brief moment when she had seriously considered leaving this place forever and finding a hunter to shoot her – where the heck would she even find the two-leggeds? And gave in. Her neck stretched out as she sprawled her belly flat upon the ground, adjusted her legs so she became more comfortable, and tucked her tail in close to her bodice. Her spheres glanced upwards, landing upon Ozy as she spoke, her words slow, soft, quiet. But at least they were deliberate, and that was progress, right? “I’m sorry… I didn’t see you there… I didn’t see.. I didn’t mean to.” Squeezing her eyes shut against the sudden aching in her cranium, she spoke further, her words falling one into the other. Did her scrambled sentences even make sense? Would he understand? Would he be angry and send her back to the two-leggeds? Then she realized that he could very well have been hurt in the collision, and couldn’t help but ask, “You’re not hurt… are you?” Moments… That was all it took. And baby steps towards progress. We forget we change... wordcount;; one thousand, five hundred, twenty-nine lyrics;; hurt by johnny cash notes;; Tyra - I'll leave Kaelyn(Starr) to reply to you for the time being, as Rumor is, well as you can see, a mess herself, lol. Starr - I'll be posting Roman next, he and Nuada can be elsewhere, chatting, yes?

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